Titles, Labels, and...Freedom

Greetings, Dear Friends!

Susie Larson here.

And to those visiting, I say welcome! I post every Wednesday and my sole purpose is to nourish your soul along the way.

Before I get into my topic, I have a little business to take care of. As most of you know, each month I give away a $10.00 gift card to someone who posts on my blog. 

In celebration of my new release, "The Uncommon Woman"

...this month I'll be giving away a $50.00 VISA gift card to someone who posts on my blog. 

Each week I'll post what it means to be uncommon and I want to hear from you! Share your own insights and perspectives. Lots of people visit this site and will definitely glean from what you have to share.

Now, on to my topic...

You may be wondering why I posted a picture of a couple of pairs of feet today. Well, I have a good reason!

Those feet belong to my husband Kevin and me (the big ones are Kevin's). 

Let me tell you, I don't know another person who enjoys their feet like Kevin does. He loves his feet! In the morning when he sees his feet for the first time, he wiggles his toes and says hello as if he and they were long lost friends.

I envy him. :)

I have ugly feet. Or at least that's what I've thought all my life. 

I can say this with a light heart now but when I was a child, my sweet father (whom I adore more than words can say) made a joke about my feet and his words left an indelible impact on me.

I remember it like it was yesterday. I was standing on the edge of the picnic table with all of my weight on my toes. I was getting ready to do a back flip off of the table (something my sisters and I did with some regularity). 

My dad sat down at the table, looked at my gnarly feet, and said, "Yikes, you have ugly feet!..." He went on to say a few more teasing comments about my calloused feet as I went sailing through the air to complete my back flip.

He was simply teasing and meant nothing by it but for the next 30 years or so, I was convinced that I should hide my feet. Even now, I have such an appreciation for cute feet because right now, with a secure heart and mind, I can look down at my feet and say, 'You know, he was right. My feet are pretty gnarly looking!" But I can laugh about it.

What does this have to do with titles, labels, and freedom, and how does it connect with being UNCOMMON?

Of course, my 'ugly feet' story is a small and trivial matter in the face of the real issues and deep pain we all deal with. 

Every one of us have been on the receiving end of words that shot like an arrow to the center of our souls. Without thinking too long about it, most of us can think of hurtful assessments and judgements that have left their mark on us. Furthermore, most of us remember many of our own words that we wish we could retract.

We can all think of past mistakes that still have the power to haunt us (unless of course, we've truly been set free from them).

And on the flip side, we can all think of certain titles, accomplishments, or associations that we have relied on to give us a certain sense of importance or validation. Often, we pursue 'titles' and 'position' to make up for the wounds and the lies that bind us.

Jesus was not impressed with position or titles, and He came to set us free from our past mistakes, hurtful words, and binding labels. 

Here's an excerpt from "The Uncommon Woman"...

"Jesus came to destroy the evil hierarchy that exists in our world. The Bible says that He resists and distances Himself from the proud, but He gives grace to the humble. He draws near to and confides in those who love and fear Him. He confronts those who are impressed only with themselves.

"Consequently, the banners of title and position are not the solutions for someone burdened by labels accumulated from past hurts. They are merely substitutes for the true identity that Jesus offers. Covering up insecurities with accomplishments never turns lies into truths.

"What's wonderful is that Jesus came to take off the demeaning dunce caps that have been piled on our heads. He gladly peels off the scarlet letters that have been pinned all over us. Whatever we have been through, whatever we have done, whatever others say about us, Jesus can forgive it, heal it, rebuild it, and redeem it! He makes all things new." (pp.94-95)

It's for FREEDOM that Christ has set us free. Refuse, therefore, to be subject to a yoke of slavery, of lies, and of old words. 

Embrace the beautiful truth about yourself. You're totally loved and completely provided for. You have everything you need to love and forgive others the way God Himself has loved and forgiven you. Be Free!

Until next week...

Comments

[Margaret]

Such a tough thing to remember and yet I am trying desperatly to teach this to my teen girls. I don't struggle with forgiving others, I struggle with forgiving myself. I also take every negative comment made to me very personally. It takes so long to heal what can be broken so quickly.

[Rebecca]

Oh Susie I was smiling through this whole post:) I have struggled for SO long about my ugly feet! I just started wearing sandals a few years ago. I get your point about our freedom in Christ, but it just spoke volumes to me about your feet! Bless you for sharing, and showing us your feet. Which I think are cute:)

By the way, I bought a copy of your book for my sweet sixteen year old daughter. We will read a chapter silently and do the review questions together.I'm so excited about this, because I know how much your book impacted my spiritual growth.Thank you! ~Rebecca

[Helen Martin]

I'll embrace that I do, in fact, have some class (11th grade--choir trip--bus back from concert--I forget his name) if you'll embrace your goodness-knows-they're-cute feet.

He's up to something beautiful in my life. Why does that make me so scared?

I have been a real live Christian for almost 20 years... but I don't know when I have felt so messed up for so long. That plow hurts, Susie, and what makes it hard is that I can feel it in my chest, but I don't know why He's doing it... to what end?

Something beautiful? I was comfortable... why does He have to disrupt that? (I half-jest.)

I really thank God for your help. It would be so much worse without you.

Love you tons and tons,

Helen

[Michele]

For me the damaging label was that I was selfish. I am the middle daughter of three girls, much neater and more careful with my things than my sisters, and was the one who always had to share a room. I excelled and was responsible but never felt valued in my family.

Fortunately I had a lot of healthy affirmation from teachers and friends. And I had a relationship with a God who loved me and listened to me. Still, it took me more than four decades to overcome the stigma of being "selfish"—and I will always carry indelible affects of that label.

Out of my experience, one gift I give my children is to value what is important to them and to appreciate their need to have some of their spaces and some of their things to themselves, as they want them. Such a simple way to say "I love you," "I love who you are," and "What you need is important to me." When lessons about sharing, cooperation, and deferring to others need to be taught, it can be done in ways that acknowledge that childhood is a time of learning how to live with others and to care about each other.

Sticking up for oneself is a positive quality; it does not preclude caring about others, and it doesn't negate goodness. I'm blessed to have had opportunity to learn that truth, afterall. My precious Savior has loved me with an everlasting love and drawn me with lovingkindness. He promises to build me up again and that I will be rebuilt . . . Jeremiah 31:3-4

I am awed by His faithfulness.

[Karissa]

First, I just want to say that I think your feet are cute! :)

Thank you so much for your post. It was good to be reminded how badly words can hurt...or even how lack of words can hurt.

I grew up never really hearing that I was appreciated or cared about and developed a low self-esteem. Add to that a cheerleading coach that told me I had to lose weight so that I could jump higher (even though I was really fit, you can't change your body shape!) I was lucky that I did not develop an eating disorder but I am conscientious about how I look even to this day.

Then, add to everything marriage troubles and you sure do have a recipe for disaster! Luckily, God has brought me to the place where I can be thankful for my suffering because I know that He is shaping me into exactly who He wants me to be. And I know that He loves me just the way that I am. His grace and love are amazing!

While reading, I was also convicted on the hurtful things I have said to my husband in the past. I have to remember that God will move no matter what, but sometimes I can slow His work down by letting my own selfish desires get in the way...and I need to watch what I say.

I bought your book yesterday and I am looking forward to reading it! I am trying to start a small group with my church, I was thinking about using the book for our first study. :)

[Liesl]

Love this post. It's something that we all can relate to. I especially enjoyed the quote from your book that said "Covering up insecurities with accomplishments never turns lies into truths." That is so well said! I have a huge tendency to do that...but it's become even more evident to me over the last few months.

This is also a good reminder to keep our own words in check as well, as we have so much power to hurt (or build up) through them. Another struggle I have noticed lately.

Thanks for posting this one...

Love you,Lisa

[Anna J]

What a fabulous post, Susie!By the way, I too think you have cute feet: much nicer than my own blistered and calloused runner's feet :-)I have spent a lifetime trying to learn how to let go of comments that were lightly thrown and heavily ingested. We as Christian women in this society are, I believe, especially vulnerable to this weakness. So thank you for a needed reminder!

[Kelly]

i have to be honest. i have only heard of your ministry about 10 minutes ago. a friend has invited me to hear you speak and i was wondering what your topics are... then i read you ugly feet post and laugh out loud cause i have ugly feet too :)...not sure if i am attending or not, but your uncommon woman book looks interesting~ i might have to read! o happy day!

[Sharon Hinck]

You wrote: "Covering up insecurities with accomplishments never turns lies into truths."

What wonderful words of freedom! Thank you for this reminder to hear what GOD has to say about me . . . instead of trying to make up for the disregard of others by driving to achieve.

I love Psalm 139's picture of how intimately God crafted each of us!

[Susie Larson]

Margaret,Very well put: "it takes so long to heal what can be broken so quickly."I know God wants to set us free in the deepest parts of our souls. Part of our freedom involves a call to help those who are not, and doing what we can to help secure their freedom. Another part of being free is that - while we are tender to towards the sufferings of others - we are tough against the enemy's attempts to de-rail us. May God make us all both tough and tender!

[Susie Larson]

Oh, Rebecca,You've made my day! I'm hearing from a number of women who are going through "The Uncommon Woman" with their daughters. Thanks so much for sharing that, and I hope you both are profoundly blessed by the journey.And I'll bet your feet are perfectly cute. :)

[Susie Larson]

Helen,Please hear me. You are not alone! God is doing a refining work in many of His people right now.Now is the time to plant seeds of faith. Are you believing God for something profound? Plant the seeds and water them with your prayers. Now is also the time to uproot weeds. Are there grudges, anxious thoughts, feelings of discouragement? Uproot the weeds, drive away the anxious thoughts, and move back to a place of courage! The Lord is on your side. Soon, you will reap a harvest. :)

[Susie Larson]

Michele,What an excellent post. I think you may have an article in you! You've got some great things to say. I so love how God so loves us! Each in our own individual way, He has shaped us and He loves us in a way that means something to us. He meets us where we live; He moves at a pace that we can keep; and He never lets us out of His sight. Amazing love, how can it be?Your article made me consider the ways I've parented my sweet middle child. Thanks for sharing.

[Susie Larson]

Dear Karissa,Thanks so much for sharing your heart with me! Isn't it amazing how when we think about it, we can all come up with words that deeply affected us? I was just telling a friend today that words are 'envelopes filled with power - for the negative and the positive.' I don't think we even realize the potency in our words. I love that you are also willing to look at the words that you've spoken. That's a brave and important thing to do. May God Himself give you mighty insight into what you posses in Him. And may your words move mountains for His namesake! Blessings to you~

[Susie Larson]

Lisa,Thanks for stopping by. I'm glad you were blessed by this post. And I'm glad you didn't say a word about your feet - because I've seen those feet and they're cute as can be! :)As I mentioned in one of my responses above, I don't think we have any idea of the potency of our words. May we all speak words that agree with the words pouring out of Heaven!

[Susie Larson]

Dear Anna,Your sweet-feet-comment made me smile. Thanks for that. :)And I love how you wrote about the impact of words 'lightly thrown and heavily ingested.'When we consider the impact of our words, we could easily become even more self-aware and feel the need to walk on eggshells around other people. But isn't it great the God calls us to freedom? When we stay close to Him, and become more like Him, our instinctive responses mirror His heart. What a beautiful thing.

[Susie Larson]

Dear Kelly,Nice to meet you! And I do hope we get to meet in person some day. We can compare feet. I'm sure yours are cuter.I hope you enjoy the book. I do love it so very much. Hope it's okay to say that. :)

[Susie Larson]

Dear Sharon,He's given you a beautiful name and He intends on using you for His purposes. Isn't that wonderful news?May you rest in His care today.

[Helen Martin]

Oh, Susie, I have SO MUCH TO TELL YOU.

I wish I could take you out for coffee and talk your cute ears off!

Honestly, I can't tell a short story, unless I'm under extreme duress, but I do hope someday I can tell you the story in person...

God is so wonderful--AND HE LOVES ME SOOOOOOOO MUCH!

(My blog tells a big part, but not all of it.)

Love, Helen

[Kelly F]

I hope to shine as an uncommon woman, but I do know that I am a mother of an uncommon girl. This post struck me in so many ways. She is turning 10 this fall and wants a simple day at the lake, but when we extended the invite to my mom and sisters to make this "Ladies Only" they all fired back wondering why she's not conforming and having a big sleepover like all "the other girls." That's just it in a nutshell, I'll have to send you the email threads, demonstrating my current challenge of "speaking the truth in love" to difficult people!

(My older sis made fun of my flat feet, calling me "quack quack waddle waddle.")

I love you, Susie!

Kelly, OH

[Susie Larson]

Helen,

I laughed out loud when I read, "I can't tell a short story unless I'm under extreme duress." Hilarious.I'm thankful that you are responding to the work of the Lord in your life. He never disappoints. Blessings to you~

[Susie Larson]

Kelly,May your sweet daughter hear - above all else - God's voice in her ear. May she grow in boldness, courage, and love. May her conviction compel her to be an example to many who are older than her. And may the call on her life become clear at a very young age. Amen!